I'm officially one year old in the blogging world!!
Crazy how my very first post was about comparison and one year on I am still banging on about comparison lol.
I really believe that God will allow you to go through something continuously until you finally get it and the walls fall down!
This year has been an interesting one.
I've been back and forth with God, back slidden, slide tracked, confused, secretive, angry. I've also felt freedom, happiness, security. My plan in this second year is to make the good times more consistent than the bad.
However, its in those bad times that I genuinely searched for God and found Him.
I've learnt that when I'm feeling distant from God, its usually the reaction of an action that I've done...
Comparing yourself to someone and feeling less than, is no joke. I know. I use to hear people say that you can find anything about life in the bible as long as you're open to receiving. It's true. I opened up my bible to Genesis and found a story about the first brothers on earth: Cain and Abel. To someone else this may not make much sense at all, but this is how God broke comparison down to me..
For whatever reason, Cain's offering to God was not acceptable. Now I always just assumed it was because his offering was fruit, but then I realised that it could have been Cain's attitude. For example, was he unforgiving? Or prideful? Anyway, Abel came and his offering was well received by God. Again, I thought it was because it was meat but it could have also been because Abel was joyful in giving and wanting to please God. So where did the comparison come in? The scripture that I'm using is Genesis 4:1-7. In verse 5, it says that "..Cain was very angry and his face was downcast." I want you just to forget for a second that God looked with favour on Abel's offering and not Cain's. Why was Cain angry? Because he compared himself to Abel and came up short. Instead of throwing away the standards that we place on ourselves as human beings and fix our eyes and focus on Christ. He looked to Abel instead of looking to God.
God then says to Cain in verse 6 "..sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it." In my mind, the sin God is talking about is comparison. Comparison was sitting there, waiting for Cain to act on that feeling of self-pity, worthlessness, everyone loves him but everyone hates me. This is what led to Cain killing Abel. And it was the physical death of Abel which led to the spiritual death of Cain.
(Side note: DEEP THAT!! Cain was spiritually dead! Now I don't know about you, but 'd rather be spiritually dead than physically dead! At least if I'm dead in the physical I'm en route to heaven! But if I'm dead in the spiritual.. I'm the devils play ground!)
Why am I saying this? Because I was(/still am/trying to get things right with God - lol) Cain.
I would compare myself to others in their spiritual walk and though I may not kill them physically, in my heart they are as good as dead. I was unforgiving, (- thats a whole other blog post in itself! -) judgemental, and not just to others to myself.
Cain's curse led to him being spiritually dead, and I guess for a while I was too. I was doing things in my own strength. I lost that joy and patience and freedom that comes with knowing God and letting Him take control.
I was unhappy, I was overwhelmed, I was angry, I was grasping for control in every area at all costs forgetting that losing myself to Him is the best form of control known on this earth. And I'm not going to lie, its a process getting back to that place where I was. But I am learning that every lesson is meant to make me better and bring me closer to God so instead of complaining I might as well (try to) enjoy the ride!
It's so easy to compare, and comparison really is the thief of joy! When you compare yourself to someone else, you don't feel good, you feel less than! You feel horrible - its a horrible feeling!
What I'm learning and would encourage you to learn too is that Christ is the best standard. Christ is the bar! And we are so lucky we have the Holy Spirit who continually prunes us and moulds us until we become more and more like Him. Hebrews 12:2 says "fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.." and thats my prayer for myself: That my eyes are so fixed on Jesus that I don't have time to look to my left and or to my right to see what other people are doing! I'm just looking straight ahead, focused on Him and what He has planned for me!
(Plus I bet if we were a fly on a wall in some peoples hearts/homes, we wouldn't be so quick to compare our lives to theres!)
I hope this blessed you!
For those of you who are in this battle of comparison, my prayer is that you will see yourself as God sees you so that you won't feel that need to compare! And that you'd make Jesus the gold standard of your life so that He can begin to uproot those seeds of comparison.
If you don't know Jesus, my prayer is that you will open up your hearts to Him so that He can come in and take over your soul. He loves you, has loved you and will continue to love you.
Stay blessed,
Chid x
Crazy how my very first post was about comparison and one year on I am still banging on about comparison lol.
I really believe that God will allow you to go through something continuously until you finally get it and the walls fall down!
This year has been an interesting one.
I've been back and forth with God, back slidden, slide tracked, confused, secretive, angry. I've also felt freedom, happiness, security. My plan in this second year is to make the good times more consistent than the bad.
However, its in those bad times that I genuinely searched for God and found Him.
I've learnt that when I'm feeling distant from God, its usually the reaction of an action that I've done...
Comparing yourself to someone and feeling less than, is no joke. I know. I use to hear people say that you can find anything about life in the bible as long as you're open to receiving. It's true. I opened up my bible to Genesis and found a story about the first brothers on earth: Cain and Abel. To someone else this may not make much sense at all, but this is how God broke comparison down to me..
For whatever reason, Cain's offering to God was not acceptable. Now I always just assumed it was because his offering was fruit, but then I realised that it could have been Cain's attitude. For example, was he unforgiving? Or prideful? Anyway, Abel came and his offering was well received by God. Again, I thought it was because it was meat but it could have also been because Abel was joyful in giving and wanting to please God. So where did the comparison come in? The scripture that I'm using is Genesis 4:1-7. In verse 5, it says that "..Cain was very angry and his face was downcast." I want you just to forget for a second that God looked with favour on Abel's offering and not Cain's. Why was Cain angry? Because he compared himself to Abel and came up short. Instead of throwing away the standards that we place on ourselves as human beings and fix our eyes and focus on Christ. He looked to Abel instead of looking to God.
God then says to Cain in verse 6 "..sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it." In my mind, the sin God is talking about is comparison. Comparison was sitting there, waiting for Cain to act on that feeling of self-pity, worthlessness, everyone loves him but everyone hates me. This is what led to Cain killing Abel. And it was the physical death of Abel which led to the spiritual death of Cain.
(Side note: DEEP THAT!! Cain was spiritually dead! Now I don't know about you, but 'd rather be spiritually dead than physically dead! At least if I'm dead in the physical I'm en route to heaven! But if I'm dead in the spiritual.. I'm the devils play ground!)
Why am I saying this? Because I was(/still am/trying to get things right with God - lol) Cain.
I would compare myself to others in their spiritual walk and though I may not kill them physically, in my heart they are as good as dead. I was unforgiving, (- thats a whole other blog post in itself! -) judgemental, and not just to others to myself.
Cain's curse led to him being spiritually dead, and I guess for a while I was too. I was doing things in my own strength. I lost that joy and patience and freedom that comes with knowing God and letting Him take control.
I was unhappy, I was overwhelmed, I was angry, I was grasping for control in every area at all costs forgetting that losing myself to Him is the best form of control known on this earth. And I'm not going to lie, its a process getting back to that place where I was. But I am learning that every lesson is meant to make me better and bring me closer to God so instead of complaining I might as well (try to) enjoy the ride!
It's so easy to compare, and comparison really is the thief of joy! When you compare yourself to someone else, you don't feel good, you feel less than! You feel horrible - its a horrible feeling!
What I'm learning and would encourage you to learn too is that Christ is the best standard. Christ is the bar! And we are so lucky we have the Holy Spirit who continually prunes us and moulds us until we become more and more like Him. Hebrews 12:2 says "fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.." and thats my prayer for myself: That my eyes are so fixed on Jesus that I don't have time to look to my left and or to my right to see what other people are doing! I'm just looking straight ahead, focused on Him and what He has planned for me!
(Plus I bet if we were a fly on a wall in some peoples hearts/homes, we wouldn't be so quick to compare our lives to theres!)
I hope this blessed you!
For those of you who are in this battle of comparison, my prayer is that you will see yourself as God sees you so that you won't feel that need to compare! And that you'd make Jesus the gold standard of your life so that He can begin to uproot those seeds of comparison.
If you don't know Jesus, my prayer is that you will open up your hearts to Him so that He can come in and take over your soul. He loves you, has loved you and will continue to love you.
Stay blessed,
Chid x